Louise Thompson says fiance Ryan Libby suffers from PTSD as a result of her battle with the same condition and postnatal anxiety following her complicated birth with son Leo in November.
The former Made In Chelsea star, 32, took to her Instagram Stories on Wednesday to give an update on how Ryan is coping amid her troubles, saying he too is seeking help.
Earlier in the day, Louise admitted that seven months after giving birth to her son Leo, she is still “scared of life” and has reached a “strange stage” where she “blocks everything out” after a highly traumatic birth.
Speaking out: Louise Thompson, 32, says fiance Ryan Libby is suffering from PTSD after she had two near-death experiences while giving birth to son Leo, seven months
In response to a question from a fan who asked how Ryan was doing, Louise wrote: “He had to hold down the fort. It was strong, strong, strong and then stronger and then BAM suffered an almighty crash.
“It’s crazy how hard it was for him to get help. No help from the NHS. We’ve just been referred to a bunch of private people.
“Anyway, someone had to be found to take over.” I can’t wait for it to start.
Struggles: The former Made In Chelsea star took to her Instagram Stories on Wednesday to give an update on how Ryan is coping amid her troubles, saying he too is seeking help
Fair: Louise wrote: “He should have held the fort. It was strong, strong, strong and then stronger and then BAM suffered an almighty crash.’
“I don’t necessarily have to go into great detail about it, but he definitely has PND and PTSD.
“We never really talked about what happened between the two of us. One day I would like in couples counseling to review how what happened shaped our experience and how it was not our fault that things turned out the way they did.
“He’s so protective, so he probably feels guilty that he couldn’t help me.
Difficult times: She added that she was devastated that the first months of Leo’s life had been tainted as she had not been able to contact him at home while he battled his troubles
“Our experience is so different. My head was occupied with experiencing a terrible experience. He had to observe everything with clear vision. He still lies awake all night to check on me, worried I won’t wake up.
“It must have been terrible to witness what you did and to be so powerless. He also had no preparation to watch a baby solo. He had to bring him to me every day, which stressed him out a lot.
“Not a very wonderful bonding time at home as I imagined.”
She added that she was devastated that the first months of Leo’s life had been tainted as she had not been able to contact him at home while he battled his troubles.
One fan asked: ‘How has this affected your relationship with Leo if you don’t mind me asking?’, to which she replied: ‘I couldn’t fathom having a baby for the first 3/4 months which makes me so sad .
“When the pros would ask me how he was, I’d just brush it off, saying, ‘He’s healthy.’
Tough moment: Her caption begins by asking ‘where she’s been with her recovery’, admitting she struggles with periods where she can’t ‘think or talk straight’
It comes after Louise described her fears of suffering from ‘brain damage’ and ‘a form of dementia’ as she updated fans on her recovery from post-traumatic stress disorder and postpartum anxiety.
Taking to Instagram to pen a lengthy post, the TV personality admitted her mental health issues came close to ‘destroying her family’, just a week after revealing she had started ‘talk therapy’ after another stint in hospital.
Her caption began by asking ‘where have you been with your recovery’ and the star wrote: ‘Mmmmm. I’m in a weird stage now where I’m blocking everything. Maybe I said so at the beginning?
“I can’t really remember much because I’m still trying to protect myself from the pain. I don’t want to reread. This condition feels very repetitive.
“It finally feels like it all happened a long time ago, but it also feels like it happened to someone else and not me.
“I feel like I’ve erased my entire past and started my life as a completely new person. Sometimes a sick person. People tell me how far I’ve come, but I can’t remember how far.
“I can remember a strange amount of things from my childhood… sensory things will remind me of the weirdest memories from when I was 5-15 years old, but then I kind of erased everything from then until now.
“Now that I mention it, sometimes ALL I can feel are sensory things, like the feeling I get when I go from a hot room to a cold room, and it helps me connect with the world around me.”
Louise continued: “To put it bluntly, I’m struggling to get on with a ‘normal’ life. Every day I feel physically very sick and every other day I seem to have an hour long period (sometimes longer) where I feel confused in my brain – I don’t know what it is but it feels like brain damage or a mini stroke.
“Maybe it’s a weird processing experience. I feel like I’m either really REALLY low on some specific chemical/hormone or I’m too high. But anyway, I can’t think straight or talk straight during these episodes.
“I feel like I’m having a major allergic reaction to something in my brain. I go from feeling really down and excited, then I feel a rush of something, and then I get the worst cramps around my pelvis, but then my brain evens out, kind of like the chemicals are restored. I was told it wasn’t a result of my mental health meds?!? Can anyone help with the physical side of things?
“I’ve tried to eliminate some things and track my lifestyle, but I can’t figure out what it is. It appears to have no pattern and is not associated with triggers. Strangely, I only seem to NOT get it when I eat absolutely nothing a day (if I’m traveling I have to fast, otherwise I have to fast because otherwise I have major gut issues).”
Worries: The star went on to say she fears she is suffering from a ‘weird form of dementia’ and even exercise, one of her favorite mental escapes, could ‘knock her for six’
The star went on to write that she wants to find a way to “act normal” when dealing with “brain breakdowns” because she doesn’t want her son Leo to see her “broken”.
“My system is still out of balance. Last night I was up all night with the worst flu-like symptoms. Agony to touch everywhere. I couldn’t lift Leo. I feel like I have inflammation all over my body, especially my neck, chest and brain,” Louise continued in her post.
“I know I definitely have it in my GI tract, but why is my entire neck and head so sore? And why do I have such weird nerve sensations all over the right side of my face. My mind has been EVERYWHERE and now I just want someone to fix me.
“I know I want to go back to normal Louise, so why is it that my body and brain just won’t let me. As someone who’s still trying to shake off the “control freak” label, this has been really hard to deal with because I’m constantly searching for answers and not getting very far. I don’t think anyone I talk to can relate.
In detail: Adding that she’s ‘kind of scared for her life’, Louisa went on to say she ‘can’t figure out how to have a good time at all’
“Just when I think I might be turning the corner, I find I feel really bad. This puts me back in a bad place. Then I ask myself: Will I ever feel healthy again? And more importantly, will I ever be able to think like a normal person again?’
Louise then admitted she had begun to fear she had a ‘strange form of dementia’ after struggling with ‘major memory lapses between long periods of time’.
She continued: “Unfortunately, I also struggle to exercise. When I tried recently, I felt really bad the next day.
“Mainly mentally low, but also physically beaten. It’s always been my cure for all mental and physical ailments, but now it’s knocked me for six.
“It’s getting really boring not being able to do the things I love, even with a little help from Leo. I’m kind of scared of my life, but sometimes it’s manageable.
In detail: Continuing her post, Louisa admitted she ‘continues to struggle along with her newfound patience’ and revealed Ryan plans to get help for his own PTSD fears
“Sometimes I even have a really good time, but when I’m in a bad place, I can’t figure out how I can ever have a good time.
“I just have to repeat and it will pass. Unfortunately, I can’t just snap myself out of a funk with happy thoughts or “feel good” practices.
“Sometimes I think people must the hell think this is all a big joke because they’ll never know what it’s like to have been through what I’ve been through or sit in my head even for minute.
“I can’t even believe I’m still wondering about it myself. There aren’t really any words to take you there. Let’s just say I wouldn’t wish it on my WORST enemy, not that I have any enemies.
“Anyway, I’ll continue to struggle with this newfound patience, but sometimes I think it’s just cu*****. I feel very unfair. I think I’ve just started to reach the anger stage, which is a little strange for someone who doesn’t normally get angry.
Miles apart: Concluding her post, Louise explained that she’s in an ‘awkward place’ but ultimately hopes she can use her own struggles to help others
“I’m really angry that things got so bad and that I had to go through all this. I feel sick. It came close to destroying my family and relationship and I’m angry about it. I also get irrationally angry at weird things.
Louise also detailed how she was concerned that Ryan was also suffering from PTSD and said that although he is yet to undergo treatment, she hopes it will work because she “hates to see him suffer”.
She continued, “Soooooooo… when I’m not feeling well and when I’m not with Leo, my head goes…
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