If you are looking for advice on how to achieve a happy marriage, you can learn something or two from John and Bertha Wingenbach.
The Edmonton couple, “96 years old and in number,” according to John, have just celebrated their 75th wedding anniversary.
They were married on June 3, 1947, almost five years before Queen Elizabeth ascended the throne.
“Our marriage was so natural – we went from unmarried to married so naturally that it just seemed like it had to be,” John said in an interview. “There was never any doubt.”
Their secrets to a successful marriage boil down to prioritizing three things, he said.
“The first is very simple – choose the right partner,” said John. “Everything else will fall into place.”
The second thing, he said, is to compromise.
The third thing is to allow your partner to be your own person – “don’t try to change them into something else,” John said.
John and Bertha on their wedding day, June 3, 1947. “She looked beautiful,” John wrote of his bride. (Submitted by Rodney Al)
John and Bertha grew up on a farm in Saskatchewan and knew each other before meeting again in Calgary when they were 20. Bertha worked in a hospital and John was a telegraph operator for the Canadian Pacific Railroad.
“We became friends quickly, and that soon became something more,” John wrote.
For John, the city was a scary place.
“When you’re so far away, you meet someone from home. It’s a big deal,” he told the CBC.
“So we became friends and that became something more. And a year later we got married.”
The similarities in their cultural and religious backgrounds also played a role in uniting them, John said.
“We were members of the Catholic Church we supported,” Bertha said.
“I have respect for him. He has the same respect for me.”
Before the CBC interviewed John and Bertha, John sat down at the computer and typed nine neat paragraphs of memories of their life together.
“To this day,” John writes, “I still think marrying Bertha is my greatest achievement.”
Eleven guests attended their small church wedding in Calgary. “Bertha wore a long white dress and a long veil,” John writes. “She looked beautiful.”
The church was followed by dinner at a restaurant and “croquet on the front lawn of Bertha’s landlord’s house.” At 5 p.m., the newlyweds boarded a Greyhound bus to Banff, where they enjoyed “five glorious days … using bicycles as our transportation.”
We were rarely separated. – John Wingenbach
They first settled in Calgary. After several stops in smaller communities in Alberta and Saskatchewan, they landed in Edmonton in 1952. John’s telegraph career came to an end. He moved into accounting and bought his first home.
Their married life was spent mostly together. “We were very rarely separated,” John said.
They enjoyed long walks – “I think maybe that helped a lot for our health,” he said – and were happy to be home, except for occasional trips across Canada or the United States. John took Bertha with him on business trips.
Bertha and John remember with photos from their wedding day. (Liam Harap / CBC)
The marriage of the Wingenbach family is an inspiration to their three children and four grandchildren, who consider them one.
“When I ask my grandparents, they know each other very well,” said grandson Rodney Al.
“So, the answers I get when they speak on behalf of both of them, each of them can speak on behalf of both of them very confidently.”
After living together, the Wingenbach family considered it a blessing that they still had each other.
“This is probably the greatest blessing we have,” John said.
After their first 27 years in Edmonton, the couple moved to Leydminster and then to Medicine Hat before returning to Edmonton about four years ago.
The couple lives at Rosedale Seniors’ Living in Edmonton. They planned to celebrate their anniversary with their family at home.
Bertha and John are depicted together in an undated photo. (Submitted by Rodney Al)
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